Growing up in Zimbabwe, sadly this is something l heard more often than l would have liked. It was a difficult time of our past and I’m glad it’s over!

Zimbabwe was a British colony for approximately 165 years before gaining independence in 1980. Since then, we have been on a slippery slope to poverty.

 I wanted to understand why we had fought for freedom and yet it remained illusive to us. I knew that a lot of people had lost their lives to achieve freedom, Zanu Pf made sure that everyone was kept informed of this.

That’s when I came across literature on the power of conditioning and how that affects how we have responded to freedom.   The question is, did we really understand the burden of freedom?

 In my journey of studying the power of conditioning, l came across a science journal. The scientist’s team leashed a dog to a stake. Then they put the animal’s food just out of reach. When the dog tried  to get the food, he hurt himself because his leash wasn’t long enough. Every time he lunged toward the food, he felt pain.

By the fourth week of this cruel experiment, the dog stayed right by the stake. He didn’t even try to reach for the food. During  the fifth week they removed the dog’s leash and put him two feet away from the food . But by now the dog stayed next to the stake. The animal refused to go near the food. He had been so conditioned by the pain that kept him from reaching the food that, although he was free to eat again, he believed he couldn’t. That dog almost starved to death during the last seven weeks of his testing. He wouldn’t move from the stake even though the food was accessible. They actually had to pick the dog up and carry him to the food to slowly recondition him.

Most countries in Africa are now having to rely on aid from their previous colonisers or they would starve to death just like that dog in the experiment. The politicians in Africa do not seem to understand that freedom carries a burden of responsibility.

Instead of building infrastructure they spend their time travelling, shopping and utilising health services from other well organised nations. They blame everything and everyone apart from themselves for their dilemma.

The Zimbabwean government has been blaming the sanctions imposed on them by the governments in the west. What l didn’t realise was that these sanctions were imposed whilst Zimbabwe was still colonised, known as the Southern Rhodesia then.  However, the Smith dispensation was able to thrive despite these sanctions and the country became so prosperous that it was labelled the bread basket of Africa!

On the other hand, since Zanu PF took over, plenty other precious minerals have been discovered in Zimbabwe. It has not impacted the economy of the country, due to mismanagement and their corrupt ways of handling resources.

The above experiment although cruel demonstrated that when the mind of an animal is conditioned, it will live within the limitations imposed upon it even after it is set free! There is no way to walk to freedom without shouldering it’s responsibility. The people of Zimbabwe do not appear or feel free at all because of the government’s failure to manage resources.

Without mental transformation, the actions we take to change may only produce a new place where we continue to do our old things. The answer lies in renewing our mind and not blaming others. They spent years conditioning us and we have to spend years educating ourselves! It starts with each and every one of us!

A psychologist conducting a stress management seminar, began by telling everyone how everyday we are faced with challenges which help us grow and help define us.  He explained that sometimes  when stress creeps in, it makes things seem impossible and can even paralyse us, preventing us from doing things that need to be done.

 To illustrate, he poured water into a drinking glass and asked all the students how heavy they estimated the  glass of water to be?   One student thought it contained 8 ounces,  another estimated 12 ounces, someone mentioned 16 ounces.

The  psychologist then  declared  that the absolute weight of the glass didn’t matter at all.  He insisted that, it depends on how long you  hold onto it? He stated that if he holds onto it for a minute nothing happens. If he holds it for an hour his arm will begin to ache. If he holds it all day long his arm will feel numb and paralysed.

  The weight of the glass will not have changed but the longer l hold onto it, the heavier it becomes, he reasoned. The psychologist maintained that the  stresses and worries of life  are like the glass of water.  If you think about them for a little while, there is no problem.  If you think about it for a little bit longer, it begins to hurt. If you think about them all day long, you will feel paralysed and incapable of doing anything. Always remember to put the glass down

One day a professor entered the classroom and asked her students to prepare for a surprise test.

They waited anxiously at their desks for the test to begin. The professor walked around the class and handed the question papers with the text facing down wards. Once, she handed them all out she asked her students to turn the page and begin…

To everyone’s surprise they were no questions just a black dot in the centre of the page.

The professor explained, to everyone’s confusion that she wanted them to write what they saw on the page.  The worried students began to do what they had been told to do.

At the end of the class, the professor took all the answers and read them aloud in front of the students. All of them, with no exceptions described the black dot, trying to explain it’s position in the middle of the sheet. After all the answers had been read the classroom was silent, the professor began to explain….

“I’m not going to grade you on this test, I just wanted to give you something to think about.”

“No one wrote about the white part of the paper. Everyone focused on the black dot and the same happens in our lives. We have a large side of the white paper. Many wonderful things we have or happening around us but we take all of it for granted and we focus our attention and energy only on the small, dotlike failures and disappointments. The health issues, the money that we need, the luxuries we don’t have, relationships, complications , problems with family members disappointments with friends and so on.

Life is a special gift and we always have reasons to celebrate. It is changing and renewing everyday. Our friends, jobs, livelihood, love, family and all the miracles we could see. We need to realise that the dark spots are very small and only few. And yet we allow these to pollute our minds. Take your eyes away from the black spots in your life. Enjoy each one of your blessings each moment that life gives you.

 Whilst teaching timetables in school one day.   The teacher started by writing the nine times table on the board. She deliberately put the wrong answer for the first sum. 

9×1=7

9×2=18

9×3=27

9×4=36

9×5=45

9×6=54

9×7=63

9×8=72

9×9=81

9×10=90

For the rest of the list she wrote the timetable correctly. When she was finished, she looked at the students and they were laughing at her because she had got the first sum wrong.

The teacher then explained to them that she had wrote that first sum wrong on purpose to teach them something important. She informed them she had deliberately done that to demonstrate how ruthless the world is. She pointed out to the students that although she had wrote the timetable correctly nine times, everybody had ignored that fact to focus on the one error she had made. No one congratulated her for getting nine correct answers. Instead they had all laughed and criticised her for the one sum she got wrong.

I heard about a study carried out by Harvard University.  The main purpose of this study was to challenge whether our perception, of how much exercise we are getting has any effect on how our bodies look. The study was conducted on two groups of hotel maids.

 Hotel maids spend the majority of their days lugging heavy equipment around hallways. Their work is mostly physical. However, the hotel maids themselves didn’t see themselves as physically active. When asked if they exercise in a survey, more than half of them reported that they didn’t exercise at all.  The researchers were surprised by this since their job was mostly exercise and they also exceeded the target for the recommended daily exercise. Whats more, they also didn’t seem to be benefiting from their activity.

The researcher’s measured their body fat, waist, blood pressure, weight and BMI. All indicators matched the maid’s perceived amount of exercise, rather than their actual amount of exercise.

 They were divided into two groups.   In one group, the researchers carefully went through each of the tasks which they did each day, explaining how many calories those tasks burned. They were informed that their activity already met the recommended target of acceptable active lifestyle.

The other group was given no information at all.

One month later the researchers returned to obtain physical measurements and they were astonished by the results! In the group that had been educated there was a decrease in their blood pressure, weight and waist measurements. However there were no changes in the measurements in the group given no information.

Whilst conducting the research, the team surveyed both groups and found no indication that they had altered their routines in any way. The only change applied was changing the mindset of one group.

On a dark, cold and grey day during a downpour, two marketers wake up in their different locations. The first one jumps up from the bed when his alarm goes off. He draws the curtain back and noticed how terrible the weather is. Makes up his mind quickly and resolves that it’s insane to go out in that type of weather!  Greatly, feels relief as he steps back into bed. After all, he consoles himself  probably not many businesses  will open that day anyway,  due to bad weather. He slips back into a nice warm bed.

The second person also wakes up and does exactly the same as the first man. Draws the curtain back and upon seeing the unusual weather, quickly, makes a decision. He is filled with a deep sense of determination and he concludes that the different weather makes it a perfect day to go selling because they are bound to be no other salesman.  Infact, he is certain that most salesman, do not go out in this kind of weather so  that would give him an advantage as he would be able to access their share of customers too.

At the dawn of the day, deep in the African forest. There is a gazelle waking up to a new day.  This gazelle  is filled with determination. As it wakes up to face a new day, it knows that it has to run very hard and very fast to preserve it’s life. It knows that the only way it can stay alive is to outrun the lion or else it loses it’s life and becomes the lion’s dinner.

On the other hand, the lion is also waking up to a new day. This lion is filled with purpose and the goal for the day is chase and catch a gazelle  without fail in order to feed and not starve. This lion knows that if it doesn’t run hard and fast it will die of hunger. It needs to consume the gazelle to survive.

 In other words, for these  two animals it really doesn’t matter whether it’s a gazelle or a lion planning the day. Both animals know that, when the sun starts shining they better start running   and they have to run whether they like it or not because their life depends on it. The overall goal is to live long but, everyday, they perform a task towards achievement of the overall goal.

This lesson teaches me a lot. Does it teach you anything? Please leave a comment.

After starting my Blog and writing for a while.  l began to think about stepping out of my comfort zone, subsequent to realising that my church did not seem to have a blog. l thought about offering my services to write and manage the church Blog. Specifically, l wanted to reflect on the Pastor’s sermons to cater for those who were not able to watch the recorded sermons but could spare a few minutes to read.

The more l contemplated on this idea the more l felt overwhelmed with fear, ultimately   l decided against pursuing this goal.

I know that successful people are highly ambitious and they challenge themselves, constantly to step out of the comfort zone.  My conclusion was not entirely based on fear. The reality for me Altovise, is that not many people are reading My Blog except for my faithful close family. Furthermore, l have been utilising Face-book ads to market myself but stopped when l noticed that people would like my page but never read my content.

 In view of all this, I went back to the drawing table to search for answers, then l stumbled upon a lady called Patrice Washington on you tube. She discussed how she implemented numerous success principles in her life. However, the one that stood out for me, was when she mentioned that she accredits all her success to “Godly winks”. Which is basically a special sign from above, acknowledging that you are on the right path. This apparently helped her through in her moments of doubt. Much similar to what l was going through.

Hence, with the understanding that wisdom is applying what you have learnt to reach set goals. l prayed and articulated to God that l would carry on writing only if l received a sign to confirm approval of my chosen path. I requested my own Godly wink from God and waited.

Even though l know that success is not an overnight or instant thing l still needed conviction to work on my Blog. I would hold onto this belief until l achieve my goals.

I had been away from my Blog for exactly a week and this morning l woke up to a notification from word press informing me that you had liked my post. Happy days! At which point l looked you up to check who you are. I was amazed, l found out that you are a best-selling author, A keynote speaker, Tele-summit strategist, founder of the Your voice and Reactive me online communities, V.i.p live streamer and Head script writer for Breaking Free International.

You are also a mother just like me. Altovise, I just wanted to write and let you know that by liking my writing, you did something extremely special for me. Thank you for being my Godly wink, this morning you have made my day and l am thankful that God used you to encourage me in my moment of weakness. You are an awesome individual, your story makes you a powerful role model to me. I needed someone like you in my life. I found you on you tube and have been listening to the interview’s you gave on podcasts.

Your two books, It’s ok to cry and Define your voice, are now top of my list.

An area of great frustration in my life has been failing to save money, even though l knew that it was a sensible thing to do as an adult.  Growing up, my father always educated us (myself and my siblings) about the importance of saving up, for a rainy day.  I understood the reality, a rainy day may present in my life, whether l liked it or not. I didn’t necessary feel obliged to prepare for it. l resolved to focus on the positive aspect of my life!

When my husband and l sat down to plan our budget, l detested having to refer to our rainy-day fund because l knew that words are powerful and l believe in utilising   words to create a favourable reality rather than focussing on the unfavourable outcome. Expecting a rainy-day, definitely seemed like a negative outcome.

In view of this l became very reluctant to talk about the rainy-day fund, l was aware that talking about it meant that a rainy day was sure to come if we expected it.  Not planning or discussing our saving initiative created a failing saving plan.

I was convinced that if we save the money, an emergency or crises needing the exact amount of money we had, in our savings would arise.  Subsequently, all our savings would be depleted, and we would need to start over. I perceived this because, the cycle had been going on and on, in my life for as long as l can remember.

However l have saved up money and achieved other goals previously, therefore l knew that the reason why l couldn’t save up extra money for opportunities was because my strategy needed evaluation.

Whenever we change seasons in our life, whenever we grow, our strategy should change as well (Dr Cindy Trimm). My new strategy for motivating myself to save up more was that, l labelled my savings fund, “the opportunity fund”. Since then my savings began to grow steadily and seeing my opportunity fund also feels me with hope and excitement.

Saving is now top of my priorities, it is the first task l do before paying all my bills. I needed to be specific and call it what it is. The opportunity fund, not the rainy day fund.

I no longer subscribe to the old-adage that knowledge is power. I have progressed onto investigating the difference between wisdom and knowledge. l have since learnt that knowledge is simply acquiring knowledge. Whilst wisdom, is actually knowing, how to apply that knowledge to achieve results in my life.

Successful people advocate implementing numerous principles to achieve set goals, i.e, journaling, affirmations, exercising, mentorship etc. I singled out a phenomenon congruent with successful people. People that go on to achieve success, are so resourceful. They always manage to connect with influential individuals, at the beginning of their career such that they will be able to provide resources needed. Tony Robbins argued that it’s not a case of having capital, it’s about being resourceful.

 Hence articulating connection became a personal goal so crucial for the reason that, connecting is the ability to relate to and identify with people in such a way that it increases your influence with them. Furthermore, your ability to influence the influencers will determine your ability to grow (John Maxwell).

According to John Maxwell, everybody communicates but few connect. My research on this subject lead to discovering helpful skills such as good listening skills, empathising and finding common ground etc.  The main thing l learned was that, it is easier to connect with someone when you connect emotionally.

Essentially all the incidents in my life that are associated with strong emotion whether its sadness, anger or happiness are easy to recall. As human beings we experience emotion and we are capable of making a connection based on this, despite our different backgrounds. Armed with this knowledge l decided to see if it works.

The person l chose to connect with is a motivational speaker called Lisa Nichols. She is a public figure and l have to admit, l wasn’t very hopeful but l decided to grow my connecting muscle, so to speak.

I am an avid fan of Lisa Nichols as you would probably know. I have listened to her speech, l read her books l follow her on social media.

My opportunity came when Lisa posted pictures of her son Jelani, who recently got married. Everybody visited Lisa’s page and expressed their congratulations. l saw my chance to connect.

I decided to pen a message to Lisa and l felt emotional as l typed it.

“Dear Lisa, l feel like l have known you and Jelani personally since Jelani was a baby. I was moved by your story,  Jelani was a little baby and after running out of money to buy diapers, you wrapped him in cloth and with tears in your eyes ,you touched him and you said, don’t worry Jelani mummy will never be this poor again. To see Jelani today as a grown man and the success you have accomplished makes me feel genuinely pleased for you! You deserve to celebrate and be happy. Congratulations!!.” I pressed post and waited.

After a few days there was no response and l consoled myself. After all Lisa is a public figure and it would probably take me a few attempts to connect with her.

As l follow her on social media, l logged in one day and hey presto!  Lisa had responded by making me a top fan on her page!!!!

I was ecstatic l knew that my message had  stood out and l had connected to Lisa emotionally. I had succeeded in connecting with Lisa, because  l observed that whenever she told the  story about reaching rock bottom with her son, she gets emotional and being a mother myself, imagining what that must have been like makes me emotional too.

I was pleased that l was able to connect with an influential person but most importantly l felt successful. I implemented my learning to achieve results.