What made me decide to pursue my purpose.

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Even though I was juggling a busy job, enjoying being a mum and a wife l still should have been experiencing fulfilment, l thought. I concluded this because having a marriage and a family is a blessing from God, it is the epitome of self-actualisation.

l couldn’t help but notice the growing feeling of discontent. I presumed that this feeling was being generated by the stressful job in my life. Needless to say l now know that this job could have been less stressful if my life was being guided by vision, goals and dreams.

 l discovered that in order to have a fulfilling life l needed these things in my life. The problem was that not only did l not have dreams, but I didn’t know what my dreams were. Worse still l didn’t have any talents and l hadn’t spent any time exploring what my habits or passions are. This is typical when you neglect self-love, you become a stranger to yourself and no one can help you.

The more l searched the more l discovered that every single one of us has talents. The only way to discover the talents, dreams and goals that could transform our life was by engaging self-love and getting to know ourselves.

Prior to this l had assumed that I was too busy to spend time on my habits, l thought l  had no talents and felt like l didn’t need these things. I just focused on the job which enabled me to earn a living.  This is the reason why l had remained stressed and lacked contentment with my life.

l needed to have dreams and goals to eradicate the stress in my life. Having dreams and goals means that you have something to focus on no matter what challenges life throws at you.


The sunflower has a special skill called heliotropism, it always faces the sun. It can turn itself and follow the sun no matter what and we possess this same strain. Being stressed is a decision we can avoid.

We avoid it by creating time and spending it on getting to know ourselves. This can include journaling and reflecting on our lives.   Becoming really intentional about searching for our likes and dislikes. The secret desires that God has hidden in our hearts.  Considering what our expectations out of life are and deciding that achieving our dreams is our birth right and we are entitled to them.

Feeling   convinced that we are worthy and we deserve the best out of life. This is selflove, when we practise this, we will be able to create a vision for our lives.  We will develop our dreams and create goals then banish the stress from our life. We will become very busy  pursuing our dreams to feel stressed about life.

Mugabe the catastrophe of Zimbabwe; failed leader, part 2

As far as l know learning about leadership is about studying a successful leader as well as the failed leader. Mugabe was a failed leader. Observing the atmosphere surrounding his death has illustrated that, despite the good in his former years his judgement is based on copious failures of his government and how much they impacted the many.

As the failed government in Zimbabwe are trying to hail the deceased Mugabe as a hero and founding father of Zimbabwe by building an expensive mausoleum and parading his remains around the country. There is no audience at all, unsurprisingly not many people are interested or give a care. The majority of the country remember him his as a tyrant and detector who caused hunger, unemployment, police brutality and all the negative things that have happened in Zimbabwe.

Although Mugabe was initially managing the country well when he took over, the first sign of his failing happened when he had an affair with his typist whilst his wife was lying on her death bed. After his wife died he went on to marry his mistress, “Gucci grace”.

Mugabe and his respectable wife Sally

His first wife was perceived as an honourable and respectable woman who came from a well to do family. She was well educated and well suited for this role. People labelled her a states woman. She was as eloquent and as intellectually aware as Mugabe. She was very supportive to her husband.

According to John Maxwell, “the way you do anything is the way you do everything”. A well informed man like Mugabe deciding to settle for someone like Grace was a huge oversight on his part which should have been condemned. It appears that when leaders make grievous errors in their private life, they tend to do the same in their work. Apart from failing to choose a suitable wife he had also failed to surround himself with the right people which meant that, there was no recrimination. They could not hold him to account because they were dunderheads who did not know their right hand from their left! There were already busy looting and swindling the country’s resources.

Mugabe marrying his mistress Grace who became his wife when she 41 years his junior.

In my view choosing a wife as good as his former wife, Sally should have been his top priority because he knew that he had not been able to form an effective cabinet. Every leader knows that, behind every good leader, is a supporting team and it really doesn’t matter if that team is made up of just one person.You just need someone who believes in the vision cheering you on!

Grace did not have the education or the know how of running a country and there fore would have no understanding of Mugabe’s vision. However, she became very ambitious and instead of supporting her husband she began to manipulate and influence him to hand over power to her?

Grace felt confident that she had a good chance of taking over power because you guessed it, Mugabe failed to prevent this again. If Mugabe had earmarked someone and started grooming them this wouldn’t have happened. Everybody would have been composed and settled in knowing that there was a capable leader waiting to take over. Needless to say, a power struggle erupted at home and at work!

Whilst driving her agenda, Grace, knew that it would be difficult to realise her ambitions without the aid of aging Mugabe. Apart from fake degrees here and there she was not qualified as a leader of a country. On top of that her morale standing as a decent human being was questionable! Rumours about affairs with different men were rampant.

Hence, her only way to succeed would be to keep flailing Mugabe in power until such a time when she could take over. Progressively he got old and could hardly walk or speak but still carried on presiding as president of Zimbabwe. During this time, Grace was becoming more vocal and preparing the country for her take over.

Mugabe failed to lead in numerous ways but there is always that one big blunder that opens the door to everything else. That one thing for me was failing to surround himself with the right people. You become who you spend time with. In time he started to behave like all those corrupt and unaccomplished leaders whom he had surrounded himself with. It’s ironic to note that, he was jailed by the Smith government for speaking out and when his own citizens began to speak out against him, he arrested, jailed, tortured and then killed them!

Although this man helped facilitate the independence of Zimbabweans from the British, his legacy for me is how he failed his people after he got the power. I will remember the pain he caused. I will remember the people who were murdered, injured or still missing as a result of speaking out against him.

Mugabe the catastrophe of Zimbabwe! Part 1

First of all, this is a blog which l have wanted to write, since discovering that Mugabe had died a few days ago. Mugabe is the former president of Zimbabwe to those who may not know. Like everyone else l was very angry and l wanted to express my anger for the way he ran down the country. After all, this is all l vividly recalled about him.

Young well spoken Mugabe.

However, I resisted writing the blog because life isn’t about doing what other people are doing. It’s about asking questions and taking a critical view of events. Every event that we encounter in our life is here to teach us something about life. So l asked myself, what lesson was l meant to learn from this man? I realized that, in order to answer this truthfully l needed to observe his life, from start to finish.l started researching him and this is what l uncovered!

I discovered that this man, was well educated and well read. At a time in Zimbabwe (known as Rhodesia then), when everyone was grumbling about being suppressed and oppressed by the colonialists and feeling helpless, he became the visionary who rose up from the crowds to deliver his people. He was driven by a purpose bigger than him and believed in serving his people. As a result of this, he founded the Zimbabwe African National Union Patriotic Front political party and stood up to the white suppressor and challenged them. He was very articulate and when he confronted the white settlers he had this to say “everybody must be awarded their full political rights, whether they were white or black, educated or uneducated, rich or poor”.

The British settlers found it easy to colonise Zimbabwe because they did not have a defence army. Hence, Mugabe became instrumental in assembling and organising the army which involved recruiting and mobilising soldiers to different countries such as Mozambique and China to procure specialised training. To cut the story short, Mugabe’s party won the war and he became a leader in Zimbabwe. Initially in the first few years the country thrived under his leadership.

Then everything changed in Zimbabwe. I personally would sum it up as a catastrophe! Mugabe and his government became very corrupt. The country was impoverished whilst himself and his party members became filthy rich. The economy collapsed, the health system collapsed, the education system collapsed. The country has no rule of law, there is no electricity or running water. People fetch water from designated boreholes in urban areas unsurprisingly people started dying of diseases like cholera.

Blue roof …Mugabe’s mansion

Mugabe’s grand mansion known as the blue roof. Built by the money of the Zimbabwean people.

Food became scarce in the shops. Nothing works in Zimbabwe and l mean literally nothing in the sense of the word! They are no sewage systems. Children no longer go to school in Zimbabwe. Crime and unemployment are very high. Through all this, Mugabe and his ministers have accumulated insurmountable wealth. Which means the country is obviously generating wealth which they were swindling into their pockets whilst the country deteriorated. The political leaders in Zimbabwe have grand mansions all over the country in every corner of the world. Mugabe’s children wash their hands with champagne and are busy partying and jet setting across the world on private jets. Mugabe and his wife travel with a private jet to hospitals abroad. Mugabe’s wife has earned herself the nickname “Gucci Grace” because of her lavish spending habits. Through all this, the average Zimbabwean is dying from abject poverty!

Mugabe’s 2 son’s who wash their hands with champagne.

How did it get like this? Check out my part two on Monday the 15th of September. l will discuss what l think went wrong in my opinion, based on what l know about leadership.

What does thinking big mean to me?

Recently l thought about what this means to me as an African and my impoverished background.

Thinking big or planning big for me means not sharing the little that l have with my nephew who can’t afford school fees.

It means keeping all my extra money to invest in myself in order to build an affordable school for the whole village.

Investing in myself might even bring a solution to a generational problem.It will stop the cycle, someone has to.

Alignment

My computer has crashed annoyingly. This happened at a time when l felt that l had taken a long enough break and it was time to get back at being persistent!

I decided not to be frustrated and use this time to reflect on my general progress in life.

l listened to a lady called Gabrielle Bernstein and she explained how she was trying to enforce a plan on her life which she had no control over. The plan was failing and making her very frustrated. Until someone told her to ask for help by praying to God.

She was trying to fall pregnant and when she couldn’t she realised after praying that this obstacle diverted her attention to what was already thriving in her life.

This made me pause because like her l have plans that l’m struggling to bring to fruition. Plans that are encountering obstacle after obstacle. But l can surrender those and focus on what is already thriving in my life. Every body has something that is thriving in their life.

Apparently when we focus on what is already thriving we achieve peace and alignment. This is where life purpose which leads to success is realised.

Xenophobic attacks happen when you don’t understand who you are.

When my son started high school l went to meet his teacher with the intention of finding out what l could do as a parent to improve his grade in history. She responded in a very unexpected way! She informed me that she hoped that l would encourage my son to listen to the news to help him gain a deep understanding of the current issues!

On seeing the surprised look on my face she explained that all current issues can be linked back to our history. She further alleged that all human beings behave the same and history enables us to predict future human behaviour!

In order for us as Africans to understand ourselves, we need to study our history. Studying our history will empower us and direct our steps in the future. Most importantly we will discover that Africans are all one?

When the colonisers descended on Africa they started by deviding us,they then split our land into small parts, imposed borders on us and told us that we were no longer the same. We became different countries with different nationalities! Prior to that we were one big happy family (ok this last sentence is an exaggeration but you get the gist?).

For the countries that got devided and still maintained peace they took it up a notch and instigated tribal wars. This is all in our history.

Referring back to the horrors of South Africa…..the current Xenophobic attacks going on in South Africa right now on immigrants are the 2nd round of attacks. They did this before!

When l got sent footage of the horrors happening in South Africa, I threw down my phone in shock. l could not bear to watch the rest of it. I deleted the whole clip without passing it on. It was so graphic l struggled to get it out of my mind!

A man was on fire, obviously an immigrant. He was stumbling about in pain and suffering as he tried to run he was pushed back to the ground by the people surrounding him who stood watching him. They taunted and spat at him, when the fire appeared to die down they threw card board on top of him to reignite the fire.

This has happened in the past in other African countries. Remember Rwanda?
What about the black on black crime in London.

Understanding history isn’t about laying the blame. Unfortunately blaming people who by the way deserve to be blamed does us no good. It simply relieves us of responsibility. It makes us become victims who can’t help themselves. We need to claim back our power let’s educate ourselves let’s understand that we all one people in Africa. If you derive joy from killing one who looks like you then you hate yourself. Look in the mirror and ask yourself where those thoughts came from ? Could you replace them with the truth ?

Nobody can do this for us empowerment means understanding who we are for the purposes of becoming someone better.

Only when we love and understand ourselves will we be able to solve our problems.

What is happening in South Africa is evil and it should never have continued.
However when Nigerians respond by looting South African businesses it demonstrates how deep rooted our issues are in Africa. Two wrongs will never make a right.

Let’s address the issues that we have brushed under the carpet for too long. Let’s talk about it, let’s do something about it. Let’s tell our children our history, they need to know that all who are in Africa and those who came from Africa are brothers and sisters. Our minds were conditioned to hate each other but we can recondition our minds in the same way they did it.

What l did when l didn’t know what to do!

 Before l go into the blog l would just like to say that l have noticed a spike in the number of readers and subscribers to the blog. May l take this opportunity to thank and welcome you and let you know how much l appreciate you stopping by to check our blog. On this blog we mainly reflect on success principles because success is available to anybody who seeks it, including you the reader, you are significant you have a gift and you are meant to be here on earth for a purpose!

Two weeks ago, l went away on vacation and during the holiday, although l was having a good time on the surface. I made a grievous error by   failing to maintain all the learned habits, l had worked hard to master. Unsurprisingly, l began to feel clutter accumulating in my mind. By the time l returned l was feeling sad instead of refreshed.  After a few days of returning l experienced terrible holiday blues and all my life worries came back and l felt tearful and depressed.  This prompted a reflection on where l was in life?

I started getting books from the library.

In the few days that l failed to maintain my positive habits l lost complete focus on everything in my life. Although, my life hasn’t reached where l would like yet, l realised that l should still have been grateful, for the improvement made to date. I have achieved unexpected milestones on my project of creating a product from my imagination! Although, l have a few hoops to jump through before launching this product, l failed to acknowledge the headway accomplished as of now. The answer to appreciating my achievements lay in  reinstating my habits and that’s exactly what l did! Life is an inside job and we just have to do our best ( Sia Australian Musician).

Referring back to our topic, when l felt that l needed to change my life but didn’t know how these are the habits l implemented and started practising. I would like to say religiously but it’s sheer determination to stick to these habits daily. Sometimes l fail for one reason or another.  The goal is to carry on as soon as possible if l ever stop.

One of my starting points was, “ted talks”, where l heard, a millionaire voicing my exact thoughts. He mentioned how he was depressed about his life prior to making it, and seeking change but not knowing what to do?  That guy then explained that the first thing that he did was reading books.  He   explained that he got books from the library as he was broke. I didn’t finish watching the show, immediately l left for the library and when l got to the library it dawned on me that l hadn’t listened long enough to hear what books to read. I returned home empty handed that day because l didn’t know what l was looking for. Anyway, to cut the story short l kept searching until l discovered that l needed to read books on success.  A whole new world opened up to me, as l discovered and started learning about principles that l didn’t even know existed!

 I also found out that, it’s impossible to move to a new phase of life without a new strategy or developing new habits. My new habits/ principles/ strategies which l obtained from the books  included reading, listening to motivational talk, journaling, praying, affirmations etc. I was made to understand that knowledge is available to those who seek it!

Reading made the most impact on me because this one habit led me to the other habits.  l kept reading until l came across the book that influenced me most titled, “The game of life and how to play it” by Florence Scovel Shinn.  This book taught me that in order to create something you observe the problems surrounding you and seek to solve them! Prior to that, l thought l could only create if l am artistic and l didn’t view myself as artistic. The idea for my product literally came to mind whilst reading this book!

Furthermore, l also learnt about the barriers to success such as lack of discipline, persistence, will power etc which stop you achieving success.  Having an idea is only the beginning of the battle.  l needed to not only understand varied success principles but to implement them very well in my life!

 Any progress achieved in my life so far is due to habits implemented when l embarked on the journey to discover what to do with my life.  It is a way of life and If l pause practising the habits the progress also stops.

Although l am yet to realise my dream, my greatest satisfaction came when l began to learn new life skills and began to grow.  When growing comes to a halt, we feel frustrated, and left out and we compare ourselves to others. I have learned that when we stop acquiring new knowledge we stop learning and growing which our minds depend on. We begin to die slowly in our minds and feeling frustrated  denotes that our mind  maybe crying out for help.

My current read is a book titled “Willpower” by Ros Taylor and if anyone would like me to share what l would have learnt please let me know in the comments section.

I am livid!

 Well that’s how l feel right now. The positive side of anger is that if handled correctly it drives us to act. My anger has led me to write this blog which is about an incident that occurred in Zimbabwe yesterday.  Although Zimbabwe was once known as one of the most literate of most countries in Africa, our weakness as a people has been that we remained silent for so long whilst masses and masses of injustices took place and now the politicians in power have reached a point of no return. Personally, l can no longer stay silent about it and l refuse to be silenced.

Yesterday a Zimbabwean comedian called Samantha Kureya, (Gonyeti) was abducted from her home in the evening by masked gunmen. They turned up in 6 vehicles at her house, located in one of the suburban areas in Harare. They apparently stormed into their home, pointing their guns at everyone including children?  The masked gunmen then proceeded to subject the whole family to unimaginable maltreatment which included beating everyone with weapons.

Samantha Kureya the abducted commedian.

After a while, they took away Gonyeti to an undisclosed location where they continued inflicting abuse on her by forcing her to undress and they ruthlessly whipped her naked body using all kinds of weapons! They also obtained sewage water and forced her to drink it whilst threatening to kill her mother if she ever told anyone about the abduction!

They then dumbed her naked and vulnerable late in the night in an unfamiliar suburb. As it was late and dark, she had to go through 6 houses before anybody could help. Unsurprisingly people were distrustful of being approached by an unclad stranger in a poorly lit environment asking for clothes and help.

Eventually, someone was kind enough to throw some clothes to our Gonyeti through the window and that’s how she was then able to go to the nearest police station to seek help. The police then reunited Gonyeti with her family. Her family took her to the hospital where she had scans performed which showed no fractures, but everyone remains concerned about her health because she was force fed sewage water.

 In my opinion this lady is a brave comedian who has been producing accurate and critical skits about the police and leaders of Zimbabwe on how they conduct themselves. She is a hero breaking down barriers because historically comedians have found it difficult to make jokes about the authority fearing jail or worse. She dared to do this in a country where political activists have been captured and disappeared for good.

I wanted her to know that l am standing together with her and the politicians need to understand that it’s impossible to silence people especially when they know they are in the wrong. I suggest that the politicians in Zimbabwe spend their energy and resources at correcting the problems of the country rather than punishing people for speaking up against them.