What l did when l didn’t know what to do!

 Before l go into the blog l would just like to say that l have noticed a spike in the number of readers and subscribers to the blog. May l take this opportunity to thank and welcome you and let you know how much l appreciate you stopping by to check our blog. On this blog we mainly reflect on success principles because success is available to anybody who seeks it, including you the reader, you are significant you have a gift and you are meant to be here on earth for a purpose!

Two weeks ago, l went away on vacation and during the holiday, although l was having a good time on the surface. I made a grievous error by   failing to maintain all the learned habits, l had worked hard to master. Unsurprisingly, l began to feel clutter accumulating in my mind. By the time l returned l was feeling sad instead of refreshed.  After a few days of returning l experienced terrible holiday blues and all my life worries came back and l felt tearful and depressed.  This prompted a reflection on where l was in life?

I started getting books from the library.

In the few days that l failed to maintain my positive habits l lost complete focus on everything in my life. Although, my life hasn’t reached where l would like yet, l realised that l should still have been grateful, for the improvement made to date. I have achieved unexpected milestones on my project of creating a product from my imagination! Although, l have a few hoops to jump through before launching this product, l failed to acknowledge the headway accomplished as of now. The answer to appreciating my achievements lay in  reinstating my habits and that’s exactly what l did! Life is an inside job and we just have to do our best ( Sia Australian Musician).

Referring back to our topic, when l felt that l needed to change my life but didn’t know how these are the habits l implemented and started practising. I would like to say religiously but it’s sheer determination to stick to these habits daily. Sometimes l fail for one reason or another.  The goal is to carry on as soon as possible if l ever stop.

One of my starting points was, “ted talks”, where l heard, a millionaire voicing my exact thoughts. He mentioned how he was depressed about his life prior to making it, and seeking change but not knowing what to do?  That guy then explained that the first thing that he did was reading books.  He   explained that he got books from the library as he was broke. I didn’t finish watching the show, immediately l left for the library and when l got to the library it dawned on me that l hadn’t listened long enough to hear what books to read. I returned home empty handed that day because l didn’t know what l was looking for. Anyway, to cut the story short l kept searching until l discovered that l needed to read books on success.  A whole new world opened up to me, as l discovered and started learning about principles that l didn’t even know existed!

 I also found out that, it’s impossible to move to a new phase of life without a new strategy or developing new habits. My new habits/ principles/ strategies which l obtained from the books  included reading, listening to motivational talk, journaling, praying, affirmations etc. I was made to understand that knowledge is available to those who seek it!

Reading made the most impact on me because this one habit led me to the other habits.  l kept reading until l came across the book that influenced me most titled, “The game of life and how to play it” by Florence Scovel Shinn.  This book taught me that in order to create something you observe the problems surrounding you and seek to solve them! Prior to that, l thought l could only create if l am artistic and l didn’t view myself as artistic. The idea for my product literally came to mind whilst reading this book!

Furthermore, l also learnt about the barriers to success such as lack of discipline, persistence, will power etc which stop you achieving success.  Having an idea is only the beginning of the battle.  l needed to not only understand varied success principles but to implement them very well in my life!

 Any progress achieved in my life so far is due to habits implemented when l embarked on the journey to discover what to do with my life.  It is a way of life and If l pause practising the habits the progress also stops.

Although l am yet to realise my dream, my greatest satisfaction came when l began to learn new life skills and began to grow.  When growing comes to a halt, we feel frustrated, and left out and we compare ourselves to others. I have learned that when we stop acquiring new knowledge we stop learning and growing which our minds depend on. We begin to die slowly in our minds and feeling frustrated  denotes that our mind  maybe crying out for help.

My current read is a book titled “Willpower” by Ros Taylor and if anyone would like me to share what l would have learnt please let me know in the comments section.

Why we should all be cheering the Zimbabwean netball team!

Like all Zimbabweans all over the world l have been utterly glued to my screen relishing the triumph being generated by the Zimbabwe netball team on their debut in the netball world cup.

As the world watched the Zimbabwe netball team rise to stardom most were not aware of the journey that these ladies had taken to be where they are today. As they participate in the Olympics the Zimbabwean community is fraught with rumours about the tough time, that these ladies are experiencing, since they arrived in the UK.

 l learned about the Zimbabwean netball team making it to the world cup, when a Zimbabwe tabloid aired a story alleging that the newly arrived team had been chucked out of their hotel in Liverpool UK!  Left stranded in a youth hostel without food due to lack of funds. Eventually getting rehoused in a hotel after protesting but still going without lunch at times even as they competed in the Olympics.

 The Zimbabwean community in the diaspora then rallied around to support the struggling team by donating funds to help the team.  Allegedly those same funds got diverted to the politicians who needed the money to pay for their own air fare to come and watch the starving team. The team who are representing the country in the Olympics without receiving any allowances!  When the president of the Zimbabwe netball team was asked to account for the funds provided, she responded by telling the journalist to go to hell!

Despite all this the Zimbabwean girls stormed onto the Marks and Spencer Bank Arena in Liverpool and everyone was astounded by their performance.  They are set to make it to the top 10 based on how they are performing currently.

I love how they have accumulated lots of fans from all the four corners of the world!  l feel so proud to be affiliated with the Zimbabwean team. Success feels good, it’s attractive! Everyone aspires to be associated with a favourable outcome. The Zimbabwean netball team have given the community a glimmer of hope, in the midst of challenging times.

I couldn’t help but reflect on this. Although everybody is celebrating Zimbabwe’s success now. I believe that their journey to success started long before everyone knew about their existence.  25 years ago, to be precise, they have been training for that long according to the coach. Victory started  the day they made a decision to follow a strict  training routine to make themselves fit. What we are observing now is the result of the discipline they had to enforce on themselves when no one was watching.  It is about how they used their time to take them from ordinary individuals to Olympic sensations overnight! They utilised time effectively such that it made them win over experienced teams who have been participating in the Olympics for years. All these unwavering success attributes turned them to superstars overnight!

Those lazy people at work who get promoted anyway!

A young, newly employed doctor walked into a hospital for the first time. After observing all the different nurses in their impressive colourful uniforms running around performing their busy tasks, he couldn’t help but ask? What do all these different uniforms mean he asked? Dr Patel who was writing his notes on the nurses station, quickly got up,  introduced himself and immediately launched an  explanation, you see Dr  Lee, the  nurses in the navy blue tunics are the ones who do the talking and they are very popular with the nursing management even though they do nothing!  Then you have the nurses in the light blue uniforms, now these ones do the work. They really do work hard. Indeed, but they are not so popular with the management! Obviously, Dr Lee was dumbfounded by this exposition!

The different kind of uniforms worn by nurses in hospital.
Nurses working in a hospital ward.

Although the nurses in the navy uniform, appeared to be all talk and no work, they were mostly  managing the department.  Certainly, part of their duties involved delegating most times, but they also had their fair share of challenges in their role. Insinuating or labelling them as lazy was unfair. The nurses in the light blue uniform were the junior ones and their work involved a lot of the basic nursing care. Which is probably the most important aspect of nursing care. However, nurses work as a multidisciplinary team and the general consensus is that all the different nurses play a crucial role and none is less essential.

However, Dr Patel flagged up very familiar and common misconception not just in nursing but in all the work places. Many a times myself included, felt frustrated in a work situation because some individuals appeared to be able to talk their way, not only into a promotion but could also  manipulate the boss to consider them as the  favourite employee? Whilst all the hard working and smart people who really do the work are overlooked and perceived as unpopular. Remaining plugged in to motivation has led me to change my thinking and challenge this assumption!

I have discovered that they are two types of people in any work place, the whiners and the thinkers. The whiners are often very smart and dedicated employees who work long hours but  they  are always  in the managers office complaining. Apparently, they are great at finding fault with other employees and pointing out the wrongs in the system. The problem is that  they are a  drain on anyone who comes into contact with them. They are so negative and  you end up trying to make them feel better  and after that you feel depressed. The thinkers on the other hand have a different way of handling issues they also go into the office but they are not in there to complain.  They have seen the same problems as the whiners but they have already thought of possible solutions and they go into the office with ideas of how to solve the  problems. I know which one l want to be.

 When you commit to self motivation you will follow the realm of the thinker naturally These people are more valuable to the organisation and themselves. It’s no wonder they are doing so well!

I am not my hair.

Lately l have noticed how hard  it is to stay motivated. It is also challenging  and  difficult to remain positive. What’s more, motivating people is  worth a staggering billion dollars, so lucrative!

I pondered  about this and concluded that they can never be too much motivation material produced. Once you begin the self development journey you begin to realise that you need more and that you will will need it for the rest of your life and it becomes a lifestyle choice.

 I reached this conclusion  after interacting with a newly met friend in the name of stepping out of my comfort zone.During the interaction l even bagged a compliment! So why was l left with the bad taste in my mouth?

We had ended up sitting next to each other with this lady, l had just met, whilst out and about socialising. The conversation lingered on to what we both did for a living. At which point l offered a response explaining that l was taking time off from my career with a view to changing it altogether.

Although l made it clear that l wasn’t in a hurry to make this move my new  friend went onto to tell me, how she had a lovely job and recommended that l put in an application as they’re always recruiting. I was going to tell her about how l believed that all skills are transferable and that l actually believed l could fit into that job,when she looked at me smiling and said they will absolutely love your hair?

She really meant well there was no sarcasm or any malice intended. In that moment l realised that she was equating all my worth to how l looked!  l knew that l certainly didn’t want a job where l could be perceived based on my looks. As any women of colour would tell you l look forward to having my hair done and l want to look presentable attractive etc.

But when l present myself for a job l would hope that they would look beyond my hair and that they would realise that even when they don’t approve of my hair, l will still be able to carry out my duties to the best of my abilities. I never wanted to accept a job where l will be obsessed with my hair and paralysed with worry knowing that if it looked a certain way then it may affect my job?

Whilst it’s acceptable to push myself and step out of my comfort zone, the reality is that l  have to deal with the consequences of dealing with people who might think less of me.

This is the challenge with staying positive. It’s literally day by day moment, moment by moment, hour by hour decision kind of thing. Being new to this way of thinking  can be exhausting and draining and that’s why l need to stay plugged in to a good source of positive inspiration and motivation. 

 I acknowledge that she thought my hair was lovely. l kindly thanked her for the compliment but l realise that l can only grow when l make a conscious decision that l will not be boxed in. I am more than my hair.

Would this have stopped you?

A young man was extremely ambitious, driven and very keen to become a politician. When he felt ready he decided to launch his campaign.

On the day of launching his campaign, only one person turned up. After waiting for a while hoping and wishing for more people to turn up, it finally dawned on him that they were no other people coming.

So he walked up to the only person who had turned up and said, “Man l’m only a young inexperienced politician, do you think l should deliver this speech?” The individual, who was from the nearby farm, replied and said , “l don’t know anything about politics, l’m just a cow handler from the farm.But what l do know is that if l called the cattle to feed and only one came l would go ahead and feed it.”So the young politician went ahead and delivered the speech. He spoke for 2 hours straight and his audience ,which was made up of this one farmer, maintained an expressionless face the whole time so the politician had no idea how he had performed.

So he asked the man what he thought of his speech?.The man cleared his throat and stated, ” like l said before l’m only a cow man from the farm and still don’t know much about politics but what l do know is this, if l called my cattle to feed and only one turned up l certainly wouldn’t dump all the hay on just the one cow.”

What made me decide to pursue my purpose.


Even though I was juggling a busy job, enjoying being a mum and a wife l still should have been experiencing fulfilment, l thought. I concluded this because having a marriage and a family is a blessing from God, it is the epitome of self-actualisation.

l couldn’t help but notice the growing feeling of discontent. I presumed that this feeling was being generated by the stressful job in my life. Needless to say l now know that this job could have been less stressful if my life was being guided by vision, goals and dreams.

 l discovered that in order to have a fulfilling life l needed these things in my life. The problem was that not only did l not have dreams, but I didn’t know what my dreams were. Worse still l didn’t have any talents and l hadn’t spent any time exploring what my habits or passions are. This is typical when you neglect self-love, you become a stranger to yourself and no one can help you.

The more l searched the more l discovered that every single one of us has talents. The only way to discover the talents, dreams and goals that could transform our life was by engaging self-love and getting to know ourselves.

Prior to this l had assumed that I was too busy to spend time on my habits, l thought l  had no talents and felt like l didn’t need these things. I just focused on the job which enabled me to earn a living.  This is the reason why l had remained stressed and lacked contentment with my life.

l needed to have dreams and goals to eradicate the stress in my life. Having dreams and goals means that you have something to focus on no matter what challenges life throws at you.

The sunflower has a special skill called heliotropism, it always faces the sun. It can turn itself and follow the sun no matter what and we possess this same strain. Being stressed is a decision we can avoid.

We avoid it by creating time and spending it on getting to know ourselves. This can include journaling and reflecting on our lives.   Becoming really intentional about searching for our likes and dislikes. The secret desires that God has hidden in our hearts.  Considering what our expectations out of life are and deciding that achieving our dreams is our birth right and we are entitled to them.

Feeling   convinced that we are worthy and we deserve the best out of life. This is selflove, when we practise this, we will be able to create a vision for our lives.  We will develop our dreams and create goals then banish the stress from our life. We will become very busy  pursuing our dreams to feel stressed about life.