Back in the day when l was growing up and still in school. My parent’s need to guide me led them to impose subjects for me to select at school. They were such good parents they even suggested what courses l should pursue because that would make me more marketable and facilitate a lucrative job.
It turns out that they were right. After doing the recommended course it was fairly easy to land the job as they predicted. Soon after the money started rolling in. Unfortunately this job like any other job came with it’s own challenges. When these challenges started l began reflecting on how far l had come in my career.
I realised that from the moment l started doing the course l resented it. The job was preceded by a practical course and l remember worrying about how l was going to survive the job if l couldn’t even tolerate the course. I would always comfort and reassure myself that life would get better when l started to earn. I figured out that since money solves problems that would make the job bearable.
Eventually l completed the course and started earning but still felt very dissatisfied. l felt guilty about entertaining the thought of quitting my job because l received a good salary and l knew that they were people in this world who would give an arm and a leg to have my job. I refused to acknowledge my feelings l desperately wanted to appreciate the life l had and be grateful!
It wasn’t until l discovered that to be fruitful in life you need to stay truthful to the why you are doing the thing. It was not about whether you are getting results or not. My salary was the result of what l was doing. It was not the why. At least it wasn’t my why . I was doing this job because it had been imposed on me by my parents who had good intentions and it was time for me to face up to that.
Life is not about blaming others especially when they meant no harm. It’s about challenging assumptions and reaching out for knowledge that makes you a better person.
l had become very unsatisfied with my situation. I was getting the results l wanted and getting paid good money every month. I went onto find out that when you do anything in life you get results and the results that you get may or may not be favourable. I was fortunate enough to be getting the results l wanted but still felt exasperated because you can only feel content when you do something purposeful. That is fulfilment!
l had not defined my why and the results could not replace the why and l was feeling it. Everything made sense because l had always wondered what people meant when they said you start with the why and not the how? l had always known that l wanted to do something else and so the homework for me became why l wanted to do this thing?